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  • Queen DeAndra Clark

I Was Holding My Heart

Updated: Feb 6, 2023

I was holding my heart waiting for the right day

I was holding my heart searching for the words to say

I was holding my heart hoping to delay the unspoken shame though the scene changed the circumstances remained the same. Oh wretched soul of mine set me free from the pain that haunts me. Instead, I bleed and bleed on that which did not harm me and cling to that which binds me like my Jesus nailed to the tree. He didn’t come down no; it was just for me. But yet I still hold my heart

I was holding my heart but my heart was holding me. A bleak existence was all that I could see and though night came I could not sleep. As I lay, listening to the rhythmic beat a yielded woman provoked to weep and weep. Slowly, in the silence the deep calleth to the deep.

Beloved! Declare your acquittal and sing unto me; the shame you claim will no longer remain. The fear you share I won’t let you bare. Come unto me oh damsel of mine; your season has just met set time!

Now I shall trust in the Redeemer’s love that pursues me gently with eyes of a dove. My claim to fame is that He knows my name. No longer to cleave to what I use to believe. In prayer, I shall birth and surely conceive a “surrendered heart” to lie at His feet. I release.


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